I've been thinking about the past a lot lately. I've always felt that survival depends on learning as much as you can from the past so I don't keep making the same mistakes over and over again. But now I realize that if you hold on to the past, you have no room for the future. For someone who lives in the "now" this may seem strange, but I can't seem to get over some of my fears left over from living on my own. I was so small that big birds hunted me as well as coyotes, and people were mean to me. Every time I get in the car I have that old fear that I'm going to be dumped off somewhere and abandoned again. Everyone I meet is so nice to me now, and so polite, yet I can't get over my fear of what they might do to me. I've heard that humans deal with these same issues all of the time, but most of them don't seem to show it as readily as I do.
So, I've been going back and looking at my fears and their causes. When I talked to Jesus about it the other day, He showed me how to give my worries to Him and relax. Most of them aren't relevant anymore, but I've stuffed them so deep they're like extra weight I'm carrying around without realizing it. Habits are hard to break, but when I let go of my fears I feel like I can fly!! It's as if someone took the leash off of my heart!!
You know how, in drawings, Jesus is often holding a lamb in his arms? Well, we need to draw one with an Italian Greyhound in his arms! 'Cause I feel just like that lamb when I remember to give Him my worries. Try it! You'll see what I mean.
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Missy, I really enjoyed reading your post this morning. It is so refreshing to find someone who understands the fear I feel. I had much the same lifestyle as you before I was adopted by my mom, and I still have a lot of worries when I have to go to new places and meet new people.
ReplyDeleteI will take to heart what you said.
Love,
Your friend, Foxy
You're not alone Missy and I agree that picturing yourself in Jesus' arms is a good antidote to fear. I'll remember that too. Thanks!
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